One New York Life

Pumpkinhead
Brewed By: Shipyard Brewing Company
Brewed In: Portland, ME
Type: Wheat Ale
ABV: 4.5%

What They Say: Shipyard Pumpkinhead Ale is a crisp and refreshing wheat ale with delightful aromatics and subtle spiced flavor. Hints of cinnamon and nutmeg make this fall brew a flavor sensation. Available September – October.

Website: Not remotely fancy, but informative. Everything I need is right there in front of me. Events featured prominently on the front page as well as a link to a blog where I can get recent news. Info on brewery tours. If I had one complaint it was that I couldn’t copy and paste the description of a beer on the “Taste” page because all the info changes on mouse over. Good stuff though.

Why I Picked It: I’m not sure where the whole Pumpkin beer phenomena started. Three years ago I was in Boston for The Big Show’s annual Octoberfest celebration. Boston has a bar with roughly eleven billion beers called The Sunset Grill and Tap. This was the first place I saw Shipyard’s version of the pumpkin beer and figured it was worth a shot. After we discovered it was basically a glass of pumpkin pie with a touch of alcohol, most of us were in. The draft version is so good that I decided to try the home version.

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Presentation (5): Pumpkinhead’s label uses the headless horseman and actually came up with a name for it other than “Pumpkin Ale” or something, so I have to give them points there. In fact, I have to give a lot of points for the cool jack-o-lantern logo for the beer in general. 4

Originality (5): Shipyard was the first brewery I came across that made this beer. Whether or not it was created on the east coast or whether it made its way here form somewhere else — I have to give it to them. Everyone has a pumpkin of some sort now but, so far as I know, Shipyard did it first. At the time, it was original.5.

Body (10): Here’s where it starts to break down. While I understand that the draft version is generally going to be better than the bottled version, it’s usually not THIS stark of a difference. The draft variety is thicker — almost bordering on porter. The bottled version is significantly thinner. If I hadn’t ever had the draft, it might be OK. Since I have, it’s not. 5.

Taste (10): Again, the draft version of this beer tastes like a glass of pie. The bottled version… well… doesn’t. The flavor of the bottled version is just… off somehow. The bottled version tastes like a Hoegaarden with sprinkle of Pumpkin flavoring in it. I was not thrilled. 4

Efficiency (10): At a very low alcohol content (4.5%) and a too-sweet flavor, it’s a bit too hard to catch a buzz with. The sweet flavor makes it hard to drink quickly so the relatively low alcohol content doesn’t ever really do anything for you. 1

Versatility (10): It would be almost impossible to consume this beer in any type of rapid fashion. However, the low alcohol content and speed-regulating flavor makes it perfect for drinking when you may have to keep your wits about you. 4

Final Grade: 23 (of 50) – OK Beer. Minor Caveat — the draft version would probably be 35ish.

I recommend avoiding these picks at all costs or picking the exact opposite.

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Tennessee Titans -7 at Kansas City Chiefs: Both teams are coming off a bye-week but I don’t think that 14 days to think about a 34-0 whupping will be enough to counter a suspended LJ and a Tony Gonzales who already went to the post office and bought the stamps necessary to mail in the rest of the season. Remember, I haven’t picked the Titans correctly in two years. Titans cover.

San Diego Chargers at Buffalo Bills: Ugh. This game was the feature game on the “Mike and Tom discuss football over AIM instead of working” show on Friday. We spent more time on this than, you know, job stuff. The best I could come up with was that the Bills have had two weeks to sit home and stew on getting crushed by the Cardinals. The last time the Chargers travelled to east coast two weeks ago they got knocked around by the Dolphins. After this game, they look forward to going back home before flying BACK to New Orleans. This game has let-down written all over it for the Chargers. Bills win.

Pittsburgh Steelers -6.5 at Cincinnatti Bengals: The Fitzpatrick-led Bengals got swept aside like gutter trash in the Meadowlands last week by the Jets who were, again, wearing the Titans’ uniforms that should be burned and put on the pile with the powder blue Eagles’ uniforms and never, ever thought of again. Regardless, the Bengals are now staring at 0-12. They’ll probably grab one game somewhere along the line, but I don’t think it will be one that Fitzpatrick starts and I doubt it would be this one anyway. Steelers cover.

Baltimore Ravens +3 at Miami Dolphins: Interesting combination of “team that got crushed last week” vs. “team that took a terrible loss”. Also an interesting combination of “Ravens on the road” vs. “Dolphins”. I’ve talked myself in to and out of every possible pick in this situation. Here’s what I eventually decided to go with. The Ravens haven’t won on the road in more than a year. They have only averaged about 15 points per game. Chad Pennington has kept his interceptions down because of the short routes he’s been throwing. The short routes take the Ravens pass rush out of the game because the plays have developed by the time Pennington finishes his drop. Baltimore’s famed defense is running on fumes and allowing almost 30 points/game and averaging less than 1 turnover/game. The pieces really aren’t there to consider this a “good” team…. yet. Dolphins cover.

Dallas Cowboys -10.5 at St. Louis Rams: I’m going to go ahead and assume the Cowboys have “we promise, we’re not in turmoil” game and crush the bejesus out of the Rams to prove how together they are. It doesn’t matter which of the two quarterbacks play. The Rams’ offense is not good enough to expose that Dallas is playing with a terrible defense. Dallas covers.

Minnesota Vikings +3 at Chicago Bears: At this point, when I pick against the Vikings, I know that eventually AP is going to have one of those days that win the game himself. I also know that will happen when I play against him in fantasy. Watch this space for information on when that will occur. Bears cover.

New Orleans Saints +3 at Carolina Panthers: I have……. no idea. Saints outright.

San Francisco 49ers +11 at New York Giants: Let’s see how the team responds to humiliation on the national stage. I’m guessing well. Look. Every quarterback, no matter how good, has weeks like Eli had last week. The question is how you respond to them. Eli’s been good at shaking off bad weeks. I’m pretty sure the Giants will handle the Niners roughly. Giants cover.

Detroit Lions +8 at Houston Texans: The Texans third straight home game should be a show for the fans. Considering Jon Kitna’s yapping and their best player is currently playing elsewhere in Texas, the Lions may as well just start going to college football games and figuring out which quarterback they should build the franchise around — then take him and another one with Dallas’s pick just to be sure. Texans cover.

New York Jets -3 at Oakland Raiders: …………….? If I gambled entire paychecks, this would be that game. Jets cover.

Cleveland Browns +8.5 at Washington Redskins: I’m not expecting the Browns to go on a soul-crushing march through the rest of the league based on one game. Redskins cover.

Indianapolis Colts +1 at Green Bay Packers: America loves Green Bay at home. Their dumbness is our gain. In fact, if I could split a paycheck on the Jets -3/Colts +1 parlay I’d be all over it. Colts outright.

Seattle Seahawks +6.5 at Tampa Bay Bucs: Will we be watching this or will be watching the Rays drop the series because Evan Longoria and Carlos Pena decided that third outs to win games are over-rated? I don’t think that 6.5 is nearly enough for this game. Seahawks on ANOTHER east coast trip against a team that’s been crushing fools? Bucs cover.

Monday
Denver Broncos +4.5 at New England Patriots: Odd spread that I wasn’t really expecting. The Patriots tend to be very good off losses. Patriots cover.

Five Good Spreads

5 points – Jets -3 over Raiders
4 points – Colts +1 over Packers
3 points – Cowboys -10.5 over Rams
2 points – Bucs -6.5 over Seahawks
1 point – Giants -11 over Niners