One New York Life

Moving along in my quest to burn myself out of R.A. Salvatore books, I moved on to the ninth book of the Legacy of Drizzt series. This is nine of ten before I can take a break and move on to a couple other books. That’s probably a good thing.

Siege of Darkess is pretty much the culmination of the previous eight books. I guess Salvatore had decided that eight books of build were enough. Pretty much every character we’ve seen through the entire series plays a role in this book to get everyone together in one giant Drow vs. Everyone battle at Mithril Hall. Mithril Hall, if you were keeping track, was the underground kingdom conquered by evil forces and liberated by the Companions. The dwarves invited the barbarians to be their trading partners on the surface and everyone was happy. All of the random political and racial stuff is put aside in this book to bring us to the battle.

Finally, we find out why Matron Baenre has taken such an interest in following Drizzt through the Realms. It turns out not to be his rogue status but instead because he travels with Bruenor Battlehammer. Matron Baerne, you see, was previously involved in a surface raid against Mithril Hall and trapped the soul of Bruenor’s 8x great-grandfather. The location of the hall was eventually lost to the drow, but Matron Baerne bid her time and waited until a rogue drow randomly found her trapped soul’s great-[...]-grandson so the two of them could decide to find the hall. Thank god that happened or the plan would not worked out at all. The drow believe they can use Mithril Hall as access to the surface for supplies via trade or theft.

This is probably the best book of the nine so far winding up everything that’s been left dangling in one neat little package. Save for the extremely contrived set-up of the raid I was glad to see there was something of a payoff to the constant attention Drizzt received from Matron Baerne. Even if it was somewhat unbelievable that no one died in the onslaught (save for bad guys) it was a satisfying conclusion to a bit too much build up. The victory of the surface dwellers borders on disappointing, too. Before the battle started, you knew they were going to attack at night. It was glaringly obvious that the sunrise was going to eventually drive them back.

If I have one single complaint about the book it’s that it treats the Time of Troubles as almost an afterthought. For those uninitiated to the Forgotten Realms, there was a period during which the gods were banned from their home planes and were forced to walk the earth as avatars. There was a whole trilogy about this (one of the better ones) called, conveniently, The Avatar Trilogy. This was a time of chaos. Magic went wild and gods died and other gods ascended and various different amounts of good stuff. This book treats it as almost a nothing occurrence… which considering the fact that Menzoberranzan’s entire social structure, government, life, and everything else is based on the will of their goddess is pretty silly. It’s used to introduce one Menzoberranzan house that makes use of psionics only to see the house utterly obliterated after the Time of Troubles Ends. It was pretty disappointed, overall. The chaos in that city should be a book of its own — not an afterthought conflict in a book where they completely reorganize their city in time to assault the surface.

All told, I really liked this one and felt like the ending of the story arcs were mostly satisfying. Except for one, which will be addressed in the next book.

I go through spits and starts telling me I should leave New York City. Occasionally the destination in question is Boston, sometimes it’s Charlotte, for about an hour on leap day it was London — but usually it’s just back home. Sure, we may have come across as a little sketchy when Steve Carrell came to visit. But really, I honestly enjoy actual doses of nature instead of rigorously regulated blocks of nature.

When I was home last weekend, I discovered that one of my top five favorite upstate homes are for sale. I found it on Keller Williams’ website

1) The house comes pre-installed with an 800 square foot Man Room in the basement. The pre-installed man room is 50 square feet bigger than my apartment.

2) The house is surrounded by a wrought-iron fence anchored into stone pillars. Handy for keeping out both the riff and the raff.

3) The three acres of land sits directly on the Hudson River. I could, theoretically, create a slip and slide that goes directly into the river.

4) The house has 10 rooms. I could have a room just for my beer.

5) The estimated price on nearly 10 times the square footage with 3 acres of riverfront estate on a 30 year fixed mortgage works out to be a little less than $100 more than my current rent.

6) A 173-year-old house is almost certainly haunted and full of secret passageways.

The city is stupid. It would be really hard to turn that house down if I put in a bid for like $375k and they said yes.

I’m not a fan of reality TV. This is one of the few I watch. The judges have been telegraphing for nearly a month who they were planning on giving the victory too so it was of little surprise when they named Aaron the winner. Between a few times he was inexplicably not eliminated and the uncomfortable moments where three white people were doing their best to tell him to be more black without actually saying “be more black” (featuring such sage advice as “I don’t believe you’re showing us your real personality”, “tell me more about your family”, and “I felt like you weren’t being yourself there”) it was hardly surprising when they gave him the victory even though he was the worst of the three. The fix was in by the time Aaron went to pitch his pilot where the following exchange occurred:

Aaron: *starts pitching ideas*
Gordon Eliot: Didn’t I hear you had a nickname?
Aaron: People call me Big Daddy.
Gordon: Why don’t we call it Big Daddy’s Kitchen? [later changed to Big Daddy's House].

Big Daddy’s House? Really? Maybe we should just call it The Stereotype Hour with Aaron McCargo Jr.

They pretty much should have ended the show there — it would have been less of a joke. Adam’s pitch and pilot was superior to the other two in every way. He was consistently the best guy in front of the camera and consistently had more charisma. On his pilot he was better in front of the camera, the food he made was way more accessible to normal people, he was funnier, and his show was different than anything else on the network.

Susie Fogelson’s reasoning was that Aaron would “reach a whole new audience for the Food Network.” Perfectly understandable, perfectly acceptable, and it makes total sense. But: if that’s what they were looking for then don’t frame the show as a fair competition. Just give the dude a show. Aaron performed worst for two consecutive weeks and still won. The judges continually tried to make the audience believe he was better than he was. After Vegas buffet, the three judges made a “shocking decision” and pushed all three contestants through to the final week. All Aaron brought to the table was a good promo and I’m pretty sure anyone, given a few hours and editors, could create a good 20-second spot. So, after carrying all three in to the finals, taping promos, taping a pilot, they didn’t even open it up to fan voting. The three judges just picked a winner because Adam likely would have won in a landslide.

Adam got jobbed in the name of diversity. You can’t take people with no charisma and shove them in front of the camera because it looks good. If you want to carry more African-American shows, just friggin carry them. Conveniently, you guys have your own network and everything. Don’t run a 12-week commercial and pretend someone won a show to do it. Viewers aren’t stupid. Aaron is Dan & Steve II… someone pushed through the competition so Food Network can say to… someone… “we had to put them on!!” I don’t understand 1) why they do this and 2) why I continue watching. So far they’ve gotten it right exactly one out of four tries and, surprise, Guy’s the only that’s lasted.

Enjoy Aaron’s show for the whole six episodes it’ll be on. Good job, guys.

I like to gamble. Unfortunately, New York State has decided (for my own good, of course) that gambling shouldn’t be legal in this state……… unless of course I gamble on horses and the New York Racing Association (NYRA) is the bookie. Remember kids: gambling is only bad if you do it with Italians.

The Saratoga Flat Track opened in 1863 and opened for its 140th meet this past Wednesday. I enjoy the day at the track. I don’t care much about the horses, really, but it’s a pretty cool day to go and hang out with friends and skip out of a work day. The grounds are huge, full of different types of food and picnic tables where groups can set up. It’s also one of the few places left in the state where you can bring your own food and alcohol.

Since I had plans to be upstate this weekend for a wedding so convincing myself to go up a couple days early for a track trip was easier than selling a trade to the Pirates. In fact, the hardest part was convincing myself to crawl out of bed at 7 am to catch the one daily train that goes from NYC to Saratoga.

The weather, unfortunately, didn’t co-operate and we ended up huddled under the grandstand for most of the day. The gambling did not go well. We had a semi-successful Show Pool. For the uninitiated, the show pool works as follows: at the beginning of the day, however many people throw in $2. That money goes on a horse to show. A show bet means if the horse comes in first, second, or third, you win. If you win that race, you let it ride on the next race and so on all day. If you win all ten races (or just can’t bear it anymore) you cash out. On Wednesday, we’d made it to the 8th race and put $660 on one horse to show. It didn’t come in… but at the end of the day you get a lot of excitement out of two dollars. I took my annual soaking but the track helps to keep my property taxes in Saratoga County nice and low so I feel it’s only fair that I lose some money every summer.

When I go to the Spa, I try to handicap horses… I look at training times, jockeys, and previous finishes. I use that to create a group who I think has a shot and bet like that. I take my soaking. Occasionally, I discover how stupid that is.

Example, after taking my Wednesday medicine, I checked Friday’s program. In the fourth race there was a horse named Beer Pong. There was no way I wasn’t betting on this horse. Since I was working in Albany, I went over to the Albany OTB. OTB, if you’ve never been there, is an interesting place — it’s a wretched hive of scum and villainy — and there’s one in every town!! On the program, I saw a horse named Midtown Bullet. I hate Midtown Manhattan and it makes me want to shoot myself. It worked so I bet $5 to win (comes in 1st), place (comes in 1st or 2nd), and show on Beer Pong, and put an $2 exacta (pick the horses that will come in first and second) on Midtown Bullet and Beer Pong. Naturally, after getting killed trying to handicap on Wednesday, I hit a $110 exacta and a $30 WPS bet picking two horses by name.

The lesson, of course, was learned when a local radio station used to have a newspaper handicapper pick horses against a monkey. Betting on horses is stupid.

One of my buddies runs a keeper league that keeps 4 players per team. It is very hard to improve your team in this league. You have to do some research and grab rookies and guys ready to make The Leap. It also drafts insanely early — we draft before training camp even opens. Fortunately, this league is not for money. This league is usually the first thing to remind me that it’s almost football season. The second thing is the annual over-rating by ESPN of the Philadelphia Eagles. As a complete tangent… the cool thing about this blog is being able to go back and read stuff from last year. I’d like to feature the following quotes:

Giants vs. Bucs: At the end of the day, Garcia’s damn near 40 and the Giants are going to be pressing him on every down. The Bucs have been talking a whole lot this week… and how can you possibly dismiss Eli wanting to throw 1,000 yards on the mug of Ronde Barber? I mean… come on… he can destroy a guy with the exact same DNA….

Giants vs. Cowboys: people seem to forget that Tony Romo isn’t really an all-time quarterback. He’s a decent quarterback who’s had the benefit of having a super-human receiver downfield who manages to pull off at least two “how the frick is he THAT wide open” plays each game. If TO is semi-human, the Giants pass-rush can get through the Cowboys line, and Eli Manning can play like he played last week, the Giants win this game by 3. Final score: 21-17, Wade Phillips’s sanity and dignity.

Giants vs. Packers: And, lest we forget, we are still talking about Brett Favre who, as good as he is, has a terrible tendency to throw horrible passes off his back foot into triple coverage when he’s trying to force plays. [...] The weather is not going to affect the Giants any more or less than it’s going to affect the Packers. The only guy whose played a bitter cold game at Lambeau Field is Brett Favre. The rest of them played a cold snow game last week… 31F and snowy is not remotely the same as bitter, -20F Wind Chill. The Giants, right now, have a better platoon of running backs than the Packers. That’s huge in a game like this. The Giants pass rush, if it gets to Favre, is going to throw him off his rhythm. When he’s off his rhythm, he makes desperate plays.

Giants vs. Patriots: There’s a reason that the Patriots have struggled in close games. Their front is old. That’s their weak spot. If Eli continues to make good decisions and doesn’t force plays, the Giants can wear this Patriot defense out. Can you think of anything more damaging to the Patriots if the Giants win the toss and grind out a huge, long, 80-yard-drive and start battering Junior Seau and Tedy Bruschi? And also: how closely do you think the referees are going to be watching the Patriots for personal fouls in this game? Do you think Vrabel’s going to get away with any leg-whips this time around? I don’t. [...] On the other side of the ball, the Giants defense is as good, if not better, than what the Chargers trotted out there a couple weeks back. The Giants led the league in sacks. In the last game of the season they fell apart in the fourth quarter. If they can stop themselves from doing that, they win. Hands down.

Goddam, I’m good.

It’s no different thus far in 2008. A few days before training camp opens and most of the hype in the division is around the Cowboys and Eagles. Can anyone tell me how the Eagles, year after year, can continue to not improve their team and yet be the gimme 2nd place team in the NFC East behind the beloved, ain’t-won-a-playoff-game-in-a-decade Cowboys? This is the FOURTH year that I’ve been forced to mention that Donovan McNabb’s sell-by date was four years ago. He’s still got no receivers and not much of an offense. The Eagles were not good last year and there’s no reason to think they’ll be any good this year.

As for the media darlings… could you have a more explosive situation than TO, Pacman, and Tank Johnson all in one locker room? This has drama written all over and I pray for three consecutive losses to see if the locker room explodes.

I’m not saying the Cowboys are going to be terrible, I’m not even saying they aren’t the odds on favorite to win the East this year. But could the defending world champions get a little more respect than being listed behind an Eagles team that finished (as I predicted) dead-last in the division last year? I’m somewhat surprised the Redskins and their ability to continually bring in new players and totally underperform aren’t ranked third.

And, to make the point, shows are arguing that the Giants have never made the playoffs in a season which followed a Super Bowl appearance. Two of those appearances were pre-salary cap and the third appearance was a Giants’ team that inexplicably made a run, was subsequently crushed in the Super Bowl, and got mostly disassembled the following year. This year, the Giants are fielding almost exactly the same team as last season. Nothing is a given in the NFL, granted, but you’d think they could get a bit of respect.

Jason Taylor is not going to help the Redskins and the Eagles are still moderately terrible. It’s the Giants wild-card to lose again. But… that’s fine. Let them travel under the radar all season again. I’m fine with that.

It worked out before.

As I now consider this “content”, I decided to start egging Dwayne on tonight. For those of you who don’t know Dwayne, he’s a dude that IMs pretty much the entire Inside Pulse and 411 staff. He is, as far as I can tell, a dude that really enjoys wrestling and has on the order of 7,000 AIM names. Checking my AIM block list, I have Jay2Cool19, jaydogkeepitreal, jaydarealist21, LilDwayne21, MaxSteelGotDat, YORAPS18, and at least 20 other of his IM names blocked. He has, at different times IMed me pretending to be Vince McMahon and Eric Bischoff. At different points he’s been from different cities and owned his own record label (Iced Out Records). Briefly, we all decided to submit all the Dwayne rants to a blog called icedoutrants.com, but it didn’t last. I wish it did. It was very funny. At some point, I’ll post one of his WWE Pay Per View Recaps here in which he’d create anywhere from three to seven different characters who would do commentary on the event as his recap. Of the most intriguing people I’ve come across on the internet, he’s in the top five.

RawisJerich008: What kind of precedent would you be setting for your IP employees if you voted for four more years of stagnant Bush politics?
RawisJerich008: Webmasters and website executives out of touch with where this nation is headed
RawisJerich008: DESPICABLE
RawisJerich008: Daniels, you must be rich as hell
RawisJerich008: Four dollars is nothing at the pump for you Huh?

Kaisen316: nope
Kaisen316: I love it

RawisJerich008: You love it
Kaisen316: I dump three gallons a day on the ground
Kaisen316: and burn it
Kaisen316: i light it with benjamins

RawisJerich008: I guess Bush knows who he can send to Afganisstant next
RawisJerich008: Enjoy your sinister ways while you\ still can cuz when Barack becomes President, you’re gonna pay your taxes. No more golden parachutes for you Daniels

Kaisen316: nope. he’s going to lose. Wall Street wants him to win
Kaisen316: No We Can’t

RawisJerich008: I don’t think so
RawisJerich008: YES WE CAN
RawisJerich008: THE AMERICAN PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN! WE WANT BARACK TO BE OUR PRESIDENT

Kaisen316: like four people have spoken
Kaisen316: the media has brainwashed you

RawisJerich008: NO IT HASN’T
RawisJerich008: IN 2008 YOU REPUBLICANS ARE IN FOR A BIG ASSWHIPPIN
RawisJerich008: TELL MCCAIN TO GET THE WAX OUT OF HIS EARS
RawisJerich008: AND LISTEN TO THE MILLIONS OF VOICES
RawisJerich008: CHANTING YES WE CAN, YES WE CAN
RawisJerich008: AND 2008 WE WILL THE PRESIDENCY

Kaisen316: yep, we were in 2004, too
Kaisen316: what happened
Kaisen316: you lost
Kaisen316: 2006 was your big chance
Kaisen316: won congress
Kaisen316: congress’s approval is lower than president’s
Kaisen316: and the president’s is damn low
Kaisen316: prep for the Republican sweep
Kaisen316: both houses
Kaisen316: president

RawisJerich008: JOHN MCCAIN IS MEDIOCRE DANIELS
RawisJerich008: BARACK OBAMA 08!

Kaisen316: Lots of sad, wasted stickers
Kaisen316: on the bumpers of the cars of socialists

RawisJerich008: Oh, please he is not a socialist

Kaisen316: take your socialism up to Canada
Kaisen316: we’re Americans here

RawisJerich008: and don’t start that Hussein crap either
RawisJerich008: AMERICA CAN’T AFFORD FOUR MORE YEAR’S OF BUSH POLITICS
RawisJerich008: WE NEED TO HELP PEOPLE ON MAIN STREET

Kaisen316: And AmericanS can’t afford Obama’s
Kaisen316: I don’t want to help people
Kaisen316: help yourselves

RawisJerich008: WHAT?
RawisJerich008: ARE YOU KIDDING?
RawisJerich008: WHAT KIND OF POLICY IS THAT?
RawisJerich008: WE’RE NOT ON OUR OWN DANIELS AND IN 2008 WE WILL HAVE A PRESIDENT AND A PARTNER IN THE WHITE HOUSE WORKING HARD ON OUR BEHALF
RawisJerich008: DANIELS, IF YOU THINK YOU’RE GONNA DROWN OUT THE VOICES OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, THEN YOU’RE IN FOR A RUDE AWAKENING MY FRIEND IN NOVEMBER
RawisJerich008: Wait until the debate
RawisJerich008: WAIT UNTIL OBAMA DESTROYS MCCAIN!
RawisJerich008: \THEN THE CHOICE WILL BE OBVIOUS
RawisJerich008: AND YOU’LL RECONSIDER EVERYTHING
RawisJerich008: If you think Mccain can win a debate with Obama, then Daniels you need your head examined
RawisJerich008: HE HAS A HARVARD EDUCATION! HELLO! YOUR GUY IS A PRIVATE OF WAR. BIG DIFFERENCE

Kaisen316: One guy knows how the world works and the other is a pampered elitist
Kaisen316: you’re right
Kaisen316: huge difference

RawisJerich008: Oh, Daniels, please

Kaisen316: yup, we need more pampered elitists in office
Kaisen316: it’s worked so well for GWB

RawisJerich008: f*ck Bush
RawisJerich008: Obama has the Clintons on his side, Al Gore, and John Kerry
RawisJerich008: There is no way we can lose

Kaisen316: Three out of those four people have done nothing BUT lose

RawisJerich008: Daniels,how do you explain Mcsame’s straight talk
RawisJerich008: FALES PROMISES AND FALSE HOPES
RawisJerich008: DESIGNED TO GET MCSAME THROUGH AN ELECTION
RawisJerich008: BUT BRING REAL NO CHANGE
RawisJerich008: NO ANSWER
RawisJerich008: MCCAIN IS GOING TO GET DESTROYED IN THE DEBATES
RawisJerich008: AND DANIELS I KNOW YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR THIS BUT IT WOULD GREATLY BEHOOVE YOU TO VOTE FOR OBAMA
RawisJerich008: dANIELS, LET ME SEE YOU SAY OBAMA 08
RawisJerich008: DANIELS, YOU COWARD. YOU KNOW YOU’RE FOR OBAMA
RawisJerich008: But Daniels more importantly
RawisJerich008: YOU NEED TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF AND START PAYING YOUR TAXES
RawisJerich008: TO MIDDLE CLASS AMERCANS LIKE ME

RawisJerich008: Daniels, you know Obama is well known like Al Capone, fully blown like Ton’ Montana
In a zone, sittin on chrome, stoned sippin on cham-pagna
Rollin ganja up in bible papers, see how high the lye can take us
Through the eyes of Christ, John, Elijah, Jacob
I make the kind of green a hustler dream
Bustin out the custard cream Viper
custom piped up with the mustard seams
Clustered green Fort Knox and hard (?) medallions
Mockin God even Italians see my batallion pull out the broad
I got the +Squad+ over-qualified, pullin over Karl Kani
Range Rover tilted, three-wheelted hydraulic slide
Sparkin lye in the clouds and reppin my housin
Like the Wu do in Shaolin

—

I’ll have to leave it to Cam to interpret that last bit for me. Stay tuned.

Pulse writers know Dwayne. He’s taken up the cause of Obama. I’m not sure who gets a point for this fact, but I’ll keep you all posted.

RawisJerich008: Come the general election, you’ve got a big ass whipping headed your wau
RawisJerich008: way
RawisJerich008: Just wait until we get into the debate
RawisJerich008: Then Daniels you will see that Mccain is nothing
RawisJerich008: Daniels, when Obama does become President, you will not be able to cheat the system
RawisJerich008: DANIELS, YOU WILL PAY YOUR TAXES
RawisJerich008: No more golden parachutes for you Daniel

Arguing over whether the AL is better than the NL and using the All-Star Game as a point is pretty dumb. The AL has won the last 10 that went to decisions. This is still short of the National League’s 11-year winning streak and not remotely close to the 19-1 stretch the NL enjoyed between 1963 and 1983. One might even think that such things could be, I don’t know, cyclical?

Let’s take a quick look

Catcher: Geovany Soto vs. Joe Mauer – Soto has more power. Mauer has better OBP. I’m going with power in this situation. If I’m considering the bench reserves at this position, too (since I’ll assume that each catcher will get three innings and an at-bat, we have Soto/Brian McCann/Russel Martin vs. Mauer/The Inexplicable Jason Varitek/Dioner Navarro. Point: NL.

1B: Kevin Youkilis vs. Lance Berkman – Berkman hits a lot. Youkilis gets in fights with his teammates and yells about stuff… but he’s a gamer. Point: NL.

2b: Chase Utley vs. Dustin Pedroia – I was glad to see Dustin Pedroia find success in Boston. It allowed them to keep up their quota of having at least one sports hero in the city who looks like the Celtics logo. Pedroia is a tad over-rated by the Fenway Faithful. They did a good job finding in him a guy designed to hit well in Fenway Park. He swings from his heels and mashes balls into the Green Monster that turn into doubles. It’s not a huge surprise that his home/away splits are 113/88 OPS+. He’s a league average hitter everywhere but Fenway. Utley, on the other hand, has better defense and hits well everywhere (even though his numbers are obviously inflated due to playing at that softball field in Philly. Point: NL.

3b: A-Rod vs. Chipper Jones – Chipper’s having a fantastic year, but A-Rod’s A-Rod. Point: AL.

SS: Derek Jeter vs. Hanley Ramirez – I was thinking it was kind of a joke that Jeter was elected to the All-Star game this season… then realized there weren’t too many better options. I guess you could make the argument that Michael Young should have been put in before Jeter, but it’s not like it was so mind-numbingly bad as to get upset over. Hanley, however, is a beast. Point: NL.

LF: Manny Ramirez vs. Ryan Braun – Full disclosure, I didn’t believe Manny would actually play in the game whether he was voted in or not. He’s listed on the reported line-up, so I guess he’s in. Point: AL.

CF: Josh Hamilton vs. Kosuke Fukudome – The odds-on favorite AL MVP vs. the third best (maybe) center fielder in the NL. Good job, Chicago. Point: AL.

RF: Ichiro Suzuki vs. Matt Holliday – The best right-fielder in the AL vs. the best right-fielder in Coors Field. Point: AL.

Fake position that was added as an attendance booster but has inexplicably stuck around that people now argue is how the game should be played: Albert Pujols vs. Milton Bradley – In fairness, this is one situation where the DH should exist as it gets more guys at-bats and no pitcher is going to bat in this thing any way. I’m kind of sad/surprised Griffey didn’t get brought in to be the DH for the NL, but if I have to “settle” for Albert Pujols, I’m OK with that. Maybe, if we’re lucky, Clint Hurdle will decide to use Albert Pujols instead of leaving him sitting on the bench with two-outs in the bottom of the ninth. Point: NL.

Closers: Mariano Rivera/K-Rod/Jonathan Papelbon/Joe Nathan vs. Billy Wagner/Brad Lidge/Kerry Wood – Yoof. Point: AL.

Starters: Ben Sheets/Tim Lincecum/Edinson Volquez/Brandon Webb/others vs. Cliff Lee/Scott Kazmir/Roy Halladay/others – If I’m Clint Hurdle, I’m seriously considering letting these starters go two each and just forgoing my corps of “closers”. Point: NL.

Bench: Dioner Navarro/Jason Varitek/Justin Morneau/Ian Kinsler/Michael Young/Joe Crede/Carlos Guillen/Evan Longoria/J.D. Drew/Carlos Quentin/Grady Sizemore vs. Russel Martin/Brian McCann/Adrian Gonzales/Dan Uggla/Aramis Ramirez/David Wright/Christian Guzman/Miguel Tejada/Corey Hart/Matt Holliday/Ryan Luwick/Nate McLouth – Coming off the bench, Jason Varitek. Point: NL.

Total points: NL – 7, AL – 5.

The NL has been very good at beating themselves the last two years. In 2006, someone decided it would be a good idea to but Trevor Hoffman in to a big spot where he proceeded to blow the game to nobody’s surprise. Last year, down one, two out, bases loaded, bottom ninth — and managing genius Tony La Russa decided to leave Albert Pujols on the bench down by 1 run with the bases loaded with two-out in the bottom of the ninth.

Of course, the problem with this is that the NL really only has five innings to get a lead.

My friend Doug has been hounding me for a good six months to start watching Battlestar Galactica. He and I are usually pretty much on the same wavelength when it comes to movies and TV shows so I dropped it in the Netflix Queue for after The 4400.

The set-up to the series is pretty simple. Humans create robots. Robots become self-aware. Robots attack humans. War ensues. War ends in a draw. Robots go away for 50 years. Robots figure out how to create create robots that look human. Robots find God. Robots infiltrate human civilization and nuke them. We pick up the series as the Battlestar Galactica, a warship created in the first conflict, is to be decommissioned. The decommissioning ceremony is interrupted by total war.

Another one in the win column for Doug.

Finding a good sci-fi series is really, really hard. Either the acting horrible (anything on the Sci-Fi network), the storylines have very little respect for the abject geekdom of the fan base or the source material (Enterprise), or it’s really good and gets killed before its time (Firefly). With BSG none of those things happened (except maybe the killed before its time thing… I’ll get back to you on that after I see all four seasons).

Having never seen the original series (or ever having known it existed) I had no expectations going in to this show. This is probably a good thing; it seems like most people who went in expecting a Star Trek to Star Trek: The Next Generation progression were sorely disappointed. Instead they were treated to an almost complete re-imagining of the universe. I can’t really speak to those differences as I never watched the original series, but suffice it to say that the Wikipedia pages on the original series don’t share too many plot-points. This leads me to believe that there is an intense geek-war on which of the two series is better. I don’t have any of that to deal with.

The first season is pretty much split in to two main plot arcs. The first deals with the Cylons’ (those are the robots) new ability to look human. They have implanted sleeper agents in to the human world who they themselves don’t even know they’re robots. The second deals with how the human race (population after the extermination: 48,000) survives and reconstructs the government. For most of the season there is a gentle power struggle between Commander Adama (the highest ranking remaining military official and the captain of Battlestar Galactica) and President Laura Roslin (the Secretary of Education who becomes president because the rest of the cabinet is killed). For the most part, those two stories are more than enough to carry the first 13-episode order.

One issue: can I get one male on the show that isn’t evil, stupid, or so weak-willed as to compromise the survival of the race to get a little tail? Here is a list: The Cylons are able to bring down the humans’ defenses because Number Six (Tricia Helfer) is able to seduce Dr. Baltar (James Callis), the smartest man on the planet, into giving her defense codes. The chief of engineering hides his suspicions that one of the pilots is a may be a sleeper agent. The evil, male-run military vs. the peaceful female-run presidency. Cigar-smokin, order-betraying, bad-ass Kara “Starbuck” Thrace who knows better than her male superior officer. Again, not to say that there’s anything wrong with any of the above, but a little variety would be nice.

All told: I can’t wait until season two gets here.

Rent Control/Stabilization is a program in New York City where, in exchange for tax breaks, condos set aside a certain number of units for rent-stabilization. These rents can only increase when the city’s rent board says it’s OK and, even then, only by the amount the city allows. The apartment must be stabilized for a certain number of years and, after that period expires, the person in the apartment cannot be evicted. When the person leaves, the building then has the choice to raise the apartment to market rate or continue letting it be stabilized. The Democratic-championed program is sold to New Yorkers by trotting out old people on fixed income, teachers, cops, firemen, and anyone else who provides essential services to a city they could not otherwise afford to live in.

The obvious abuses of this program are rarely mentioned; people who qualify for the apartments when they don’t make much money are not asked to leave them if their income goes above the threshold, people who sublet their rent-controlled apartment for market-rate (say, their rent control allows them to pay $650/month and they rent it out to someone else for your more standard $3000/month… these numbers are not exaggerations), etc. Fewer people still mention that the almost one million rent-controlled apartments in the city help to contribute to the ridiculous rent prices by decreasing the supply of available market rate apartments and thus, shockingly, driving up rents for everyone else.

So it should come as little surprise that in the back-scratching, favor-filled world of New York City that one of our esteemed Congresstrolls has not only one rent-controlled apartment… but four. Congressmen Charles Rangel has three rent-controlled apartments which he combined into one penthouse and a fourth on another floor of the building which he uses as an office in complete violation of the law. Y’see, one of the actual regulations on rent-control is, go figure, that a rent-controlled apartment must actually be your primary residence.

This is two months after the media discovered that our esteemed new governor also enjoys a rent-stabilized apartment. Unsurprisingly, I guess, it turns out that both guys live in the same building in Harlem.

I can’t even imagine the sh*tshow the New York Media would stir up if this was a Republican Congressman. I look forward to both Rangel and Patterson being re-elected. Since, you know, breaking laws is only bad if you’re a Republican politician.

Stay classy, guys. Please, continue the Democratic tradition of telling everyone that they need to take care of the poor while stealing from them with the other hand.