TDL’s Sports, Wrestling, & Otherwise

Thursday
Broncos +1.5 at Texans: While it’s tough to call a game between two 6-7 teams a “must win” when the AFC Wildcards are all but locked up, there’s still time for the Browns to collapse. The Texans tend to give up a ton of points and, if there’s one thing you can say about Denver this season, they’ve pretty much won all the games they’re supposed to win while being pitiful on the road. They also seem to get themselves spanked in prime time games. All that said, if I’m picking the coaches in what can be considered a “big game” I’m taking Shanahan. Broncos outright.

Saturday

Bengals -8 at Niners: The Bengals have been proficient this year at beating up bad teams… and that’s about it. Bengals cover.

Sunday

Packers -10.5 at Rams: I have no faith in the Rams to put up any fight against the Packers… even at home. Packers cover.

Falcons +10 at Bucs: This game has “stay the hell away from” written all the hell over it. The Falcons are going to be coming in all ticked at their jockey jumping off the horse mid-race. The Bucs have their division almost clinched and can lock it up with a win this week. With Garcia back in place and a chance to firmly tick off Philly, I totally see the Falcons getting blown off the field this week. Bucs cover.

Seahawks -7.5 at Panthers: The ‘hawks suck away from home but the Panthers just suck. Even with the B-squad the Panthers still probably lose this by 10. Seahawks cover.

Bills +5.5 at Browns: Oof. The Browns win this and they knock the Bills out of the playoffs. The Bills win this and they take the 6-seed with a tie-break into the last two games. That’s a great game. Problem is: it’s going to be in the mess of weather that’s expected over the North/Northeast all weekend. The Browns aren’t going to be able throw all over the field. Neither are the bills, but the Browns have one of the worst run defenses in the league. Upset of the week, Bills outright.

Titans -4 at Chiefs: No Chiefs none of the time. Titans cover.

Ravens -3.5 at Dolphins: This is a pick I’ve changed my mind on a bunch of times and I might do it again. I can make a solid argument for the Ravens but this is literally the last chance the Dolphins have to steal a game. After watching the Ravens fall apart in New England, I can see it happening to them again if this game doesn’t go to their way quickly. All that said… the Ravens are reasonably talented while the Dolphins really aren’t… but the astronomical odds of a team going 16-0 the same year another team goes 0-16 makes me think that the cosmic forces of the universe HAVE to make the Dolphins win. The other problem is this might just turn into a “f*ck it” game for the Dolphins where they pull out fake punts and onside kicks and fake field goals and flea flickers and throw everything in their playbook at the Ravens. The other problem with this game is that I’m trying to pick a Ravens game and that’s just plain stupid. F*ck it… Dolphins outright.

Jets +24.5 at Patriots: There is only one reason I can consider taking the Jets here… December weather at Foxboro. With the crap going on in the Northeast today (Thursday), it’s possible it will be on of those sloppy, messy games at Foxboro. The forecast for Sunday says Rain, Snow, and wind… and I don’t know if the Patriots can destroy a team by 50 points if they’re stuck grinding the game out on the ground. This may change, but for now: Jets +24.5.

Cards +3.5 at Saints: The battle of 6-7! This is a last gasp game for both teams… and I really can’t decide which way to go with it. the Saints offense is struggling and the Cards are supposedly getting Anquan Boldin back. All that with the Saints inability to win clutch games this year tells me Cards outright.

Jaguars +3.5 at Steelers: I understand the spread here is the standard 3 points for the road team and all… but I’m legitimately surprised that the Jags are dogs here. Roethisberger is beat up and the Steelers have a tendency to drop the ball in big games. Second big upset of the week: Jags outright.

Colts -10.5 at Raiders: The Colts have nothing locked up yet but a Wild Card slot so I’m assuming you’re going to see all the starters this game. Manning’s going to be outside in December but it’s in California. Expect to see the Raiders secondary shredded to tasty beef strips. Colts cover.

Eagles +10 at Cowboys: Dallas is still playing for something at 12-1. Let’s see if they can screw me a couple more times this season. They beat the Eagles by 20 in Philly, I can’t imagine them doing any less at home. The Cowboys must be thinking by now that they’re the team of destiny. Cowboys cover.

Lions +10.5 at Chargers: Too. Many. 10. Point. Spreads. Detroit just suffered the kind of loss that can cripple your season. Now they have to go on the road to a San Diego team that’s looking at actually salvaging a 10-6 season after a horrible start. Sorry, Jon… Jesus hates a liar. Chargers cover.

Redskins +4 at Giants: I’m surprised to see more than 3 or 3.5 in a Giants/Redskins game. I was excited about this game being in prime time because it opened up the chance to see Buffalo/Cleveland as the CBS game wouldn’t be blacked out. Unfortunately, THAT game is up against New England/NYJ for the CBS slot… which means my two games this week are going to be NYJ/NE and PHI/DAL. I hate being in two local markets. Giants cover.

Monday

Bears +9 at Vikings: And my how the worm has turned. Who would have guessed this spread when the season started? Everything points at me taking the points here… late season game, pretty good defense, division… but I can’t lay money if you’re starting your third string qb and he’s rocking a bowl cut. Vikings cover.

Upset of the Week: Bills over Browns, Jags over Steelers, Cards over Saints.

Locks of the week: Chargers -10.5 over Lions, Vikings -9 over Bears, Cowboys -10 over Eagles.