One New York Life

Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four

Day 9 – Monday 7/12, Edinburgh
- The first day started late after the previous night’s World Cup party and regular first night in new hotel sleeping issues. It didn’t help the streets of Edinburgh were filled with people celebrating the World Cup. For my part, PLR asked for a bottle of water, so I wandered around until I found one. Which happened to be at a McDonalds, which happened to bear the wrath of a drunk Tom food order. It wasn’t pretty.

- We did the good tourist stuff today, visiting the Edinburgh Castle and Edinburgh Palace. We walked the entire Royal Mile and stopped off for lunch at a place that teased me with a venison special only to tell me they were all out when I ordered it. Bastards. In other news, this first day in Edinburgh was responsible for the image that told me it was time to get back to jogging.

- Another fun thing to note about Edinburgh. When we left the hotel that morning, I was in shorts and a T-shirt and was comfortable. By lunch, it was so cold I had to actually duck in to a junk store and buy a hoodie. About an hour after I bought the hoodie, it was too hot out to wear it. Here I thought absurd weather was unique to the Northeast.

Day 10 – Tuesday 7/13, Edinburgh
- This was the day we expected to include the pre-scheduled trip to Loch Ness. We spent the entire trip assuming it was Tuesday. It was Monday. Oops. Free day with nothing to do out of nowhere just led to a lot of walking around the city and PLR unleashing some make-up shopping fury. As it turns out, the Duane Reade/CVS/Rite Aid of the UK is called Boots and each one has an entire make-up store in it. It’s like they designed a store for PLR — allergy meds and eyeliner all in one place.

Day 11 – Wednesday 7/14, Edinburgh
- If you’ve ever been on a two week trip, mid-way through the second week you start to run out of tourist energy. When that happens I recommend an alcohol tour. Our early afternoon tour was at The Scotch Whisky Experience. It starts with a tour, continues with an instructional class about the whisky regions of Scotland and the distilling process, and ends with a flight of whisky encompassing all the regions. The trip also includes a walk through the largest whisky collection in the world (literally). The pictures I took don’t really do it justice. It has some old bottles, some new bottles, huge glass cases, rare bottles of famous brands, and a whisky clock. Then a gift shop with some, um, pricey collection bottles if you’re so inclined.

- Following this, with a nice solid buzz, it was museum time. That’s probably less interesting to most folks than the whiskey but, let me tell you, 16th century art with a whiskey buzz is something to be experienced.

- As I partook in the whisky and PLR didn’t, we split up for the late afternoon. I had planned to go home and take a shower and a nap. PLR planned to crush some shopping. However, a clogged shower and a two-hour ordeal with the hotel trying to fix it ruined my plans. On the other hand, a slight buzz and a Scottish plumber who was getting frustrated with the bathtub was wildly entertaining.

Day 12 – Thursday 7/15, Edinburgh
- Short of Stonehenge, this was my favorite day of the trip. If you’ve read The DaVinci Code, one of the churches that plays a role is Rosslyn Chapel. The chapel was begun in 1446 and built over the next 40 years until William St Clair, the founder, died. He was buried there and construction was ended in 1484. The building has been there since, living through the Reformation and sackings of the Rosslyn Castle. The carvings inside the building are intricate and, honestly, it’s hard to pick something to look at. It’s much smaller than I expected, but otherwise, it’s everything I wanted it to be. Mysterious, pagan carvings relating back to Masonic history of the family. The legendary Apprentice Column which, once seen, can be found in various works of art and even on some NYC streetlights.

- I can’t really put in to words all the different carvings and stories found in this chapel. There are images of Jesus and Christianity, pagan Green Men, images of death, columns, and even carvings of corn. The corn carvings are particularly interesting because maize didn’t exist in Great Britain when the chapel was built. I’m sure the masonic conspirators have a field day with that one. It kills me that no pictures are allowed inside the building.

- We had lunch across the street at the Roslin Glen Hotel… which I’m sure is very happy that Dan Brown turned their quiet little establishment in to a tourist trap. They sell a steak served on black lava rock. Sadly, I didn’t get it. In retrospect, that was dumb of me.

- We took the local Edinburgh bus to get out to Roslyn. The four dollar day pas got us all over the city and to various touristy spots on the fringes. Great stuff.

Next time: Back to London and Home.

Samuel Adams Barrel Room Collection — Stony Brook Red

Brewed By: Boston Beer Company
Brewed In: Boston, MA — also aged there, per the press release.
ABV: 9%
Type: Red Ale

What They Say: This unique brew defies traditional beer style definition. The rich, malty brew combines notes of tart fruit from the yeast with a toasty oak character from the barrel aging. The long dry finish is almost wine-like. This is a beer that is satisfying on its own and also pairs well with many foods such as braised or roasted meats, beef stews and strong salty cheeses. Samuel Adams Stony Brook Red starts out as a strong red ale fermented with a Belgian style ale yeast. This younger ale is blended with over 50% of our Samuel Adams Kosmic Mother Funk. The Kosmic Mother Funk is a Belgian ale that we age in oak casks and tanks for over 6 months. The beer in the oak vessels undergoes a secondary fermentation with brettanomyces yeasts and lactobacillus to give the beer a rich tropical fruit note and some sourness. Stony Brook Red’s resulting blend has an earthy, fruity, and estery character. The beer is also bottle conditioned which creates a secondary fermentation in the bottle giving the beer an extra smooth and balanced flavor

Why I Picked It: The final beer in the vertical tasting of the Samuel Adams Barrel Room Collection Series. One final thanks to fellow beer snob The Big Show for getting these to me.

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Presentation (5): Check out the first post to see my thoughts here. 5

Originality (5): This is pretty much a red, but with some of the Kosmic Mother Funk and oak-aged goodness. Like I said previously: this whole idea of the Barrel Room Series isn’t the top of originality — it’s the second-best in Boston alone after Harpoon’s 100 Barrel Series — but I give Sam the points for trying. 3

Body (10): An opaque red pour with minimal head. Decent amount of carbonation and bubbling. The beer has the same oaken odor as bourbon-aged beers. The texture of the carbonation really manages to pull off the alcohol, successfully off-putting the burn. Really well done body for the type. 8

Taste (10): This is the beer that’s best managed to get mileage out of the oak flavors. As mentioned, the nose is sweet and the taste is an explosion of flavors — sourness from the fruits, sweetness from the oak, and bitterness from the malts. The aftertaste is sort of Belgian, but there’s so much else going on by the time you get there that it can be tough to appreciate. There’s red, Belgian, and oak all going on here. Complex and good. 9

Versatility (10): There’s a lot going on here. These single bottle, experimental beers range between tasty & accessible to tasty & WTF. This one goes more toward WTF. 3

Efficiency (10): Love this beer. The intense flavor forced me to take it slow, but high ABV kept it worth it. 7

The Snob Sez: My favorite of these barrel room collection beers. This won’t change the way anyone feels about beer, but it’s a good single bottle offering that isn’t disappointing.

Final Score: 35 (of 50) — Good beer.

Part One
Part Two
Part Three

Day 6 – 7/9, London To Stockport:
- One of the reasons I loved the hotel we stayed at in England was their tremendous accommodation when we asked them to babysit our bags for the week. Not only did they store them, but they took them out of our room, stored them, and had them ready in the new room when we got back. Our cab to the train station was even more terrible than the aforementioned bus ride as we actually had to go in to the “Congestion Zone”. This was way worse. As a travel tip — never think a cab is going to be quicker than the Tube. Our England cab experience (the traffic, not the drivers) was so bad I’m planning any future trips with the assumption that our luggage will be small enough to maneuver on subways. PLR’s product bag is on notice.

- We took a Virgin Train from London to Stockport. Sadly, there was not an image of either Richard Branson or Bill Hader as Richard Branson welcoming me to Virgin. Weirdly, the first class tickets on Virgin were only about £8 more than regular… so we popped for access to the free food lounge. Awesome feature in the lounge was a “charging stall” hung on the wall. Picture a 10×10 glass case mounted on the wall divided in to small cubbies with different chargers (Blackberry, iPod, etc). Each cubbie has a key so a device can be locked in and charged. When done, open the door and take the now-charged device. Brilliant. Travel Tip: When taking trains in Europe, buy your tickets well ahead of time. The same ticket that was £100 is currently £20.

- We stayed at the Premier Inn which, near as I can tell, is kind of like the Hampton Inn. It is here we met PLR’s friend Pamela with whom PLR has been a pen pal with since elementary school. Question: how quaint and old does the term “pen pal” seem in the present day?

- Later, PLR and I would meet Pamela and her sister for a rather tasty Italian dinner in Stockport. Afterward, we went to the Old Rectory. The hotel was in this strange location in what must have, at some point, actually belonged to St. Mary’s church. I couldn’t really tell if the Old Rectory was a bar that eventually opened a hotel or it was always just a hotel bar. The building we stayed in was separate from both. We stayed in an annex building across the parking lot. Regardless, the Old Rectory pub was a nice little place with a huge outdoor area where we got to get some drinks and watch a constant parade of flights coming in to nearby Manchester.

- The lack of air conditioning in England was something to be scorned and feared — not embraced.

Day 7 – 7/10, Stockport
- PLR surprised me with all-you-can-eat breakfast as part of our hotel stay. I am not one to be trusted with all the eggs and bacon I can get my mitts on. However, this place found a way to keep me honest. Instead of having all the stuff available and in pans, I actually had to order eggs and bacon from a waiter. They claimed this was so the food was fresh cooked. I claim it was because they wanted me to feel guilty for ordering round two of eggs and bacon.

- We met back up with the pen pal for a day trip to Lyme Park. Females may recognize this park from Pride & Prejudice. Males probably won’t recognize the park at all, but it’s a pretty peaceful place. On the grounds is a super-old mansion surrounded by incredibly maintained gardens. If I could draw, I’d have a field day here. It’s like Yaddo, but older and bigger.

- We finished up the day at the Hare & Hounds pub. I can’t really describe how interesting this place was. It was basically up at the top of a mountain overlooking the city of Stockport. My Blackberry picture doesn’t really do it justice — but it was basically a panoramic view of Stockport and, according to our friends, the mountains of Wales. It was breathtaking. We spent about six hours here for dinner and drinks as PLR’s allergies exploded from the next door horse farm.

- This place was probably the best “people-watching” experience I had all weekend. It was such an odd place. It was huge and there was just a constant stream of people going in and out for the two hours we sat there. The weirdest thing was the number of couples with girls dressed to the nines together with guys dressed in jeans. It wasn’t just one couple — it was every other couple. It was also interesting to see so many families coming to the pub for dinner. There’s something to be said either about us or them and how we think about local pubs differently… probably about us… and it’s probably bad.

- Also, PLR and I spent a couple hours hanging out at Hare and Hounds while her pen pal took care of some stuff. I went inside to order her a Magner’s Cider which, in England, comes in a 22 oz bottle and an accompanying glass of ice. Unfortunately, after half the bottle, most of the ice is gone. I went inside to get myself a refill and ask the bartender for a “cup of ice” for the rest of PLR’s cider. He looked at me quizzically and asked “a cup?” I said, “yes, a cup… for cider.” He then left the bar area, walked to the kitchen, got a coffee mug, and filled it with ice. I guess I should have said “glass of ice?” I still don’t know.

Day 8 – 7/11, Stockport to Scotland
- National Rail was a very different train experience than Virgin. What we didn’t know was that seats are a little more “first come, first serve” on these trains. Kinda like Metro-North. Fortunately, we reserved seats, but the reservation on these trains are done by someone sticking a paper ticket in the seat saying the two stations the seats are reserved between. Also something we weren’t expecting — the luggage racks over the seats were insanely small. Say what you will about Amtrak, but they at least give you space above your seat to put luggage. National Rail — not so much. After only two times sitting in business class I really really really missed business class.

- My goal of watching the World Cup final in the UK is realized as PLR and I go to the Queens Arms to watch a surprisingly violent soccer match. The bar was mobbed and most people had turned on the Netherlands because of their dirty play over the night. How Howard Webb didn’t give a red card over a ninja kick to the chest remains a mystery.

Next: Scotland!

This is the first, unedited draft of the post going up at Inside Pulse Sports tomorrow. Forgive typos.

Key Additions: An entire secondary anchored by Antrel Rolle, a draft class full of defensive linemen, Osi Umenyora’s fully-healed ACL, Justin Tuck, and hopefully’s Brand Jacobs’ power game.

Key Losses: Antonio Pierce, Domenik Hixon (IR), Chase Blackburn (carted off vs. Jets) Jeff Feagles, and, sadly, still Michael Strahan.

Vegas O/U: 8.5

Last Season

Last season, as you may recall, the Giants rushed out to a fast 5-3 start before crapping a big 3-5 down the stretch. This mostly occurred for two reasons. First, the Giants’ running game fell apart as Brandon Jacobs turned in a frustrating season where he went from “unfair 250 lb running back who barreled in to the line for 5 yards” to “250 lb back who tried to make LDT-like cuts.” Second, injuries to the Giants’ secondary started piling up until they reached the point where Drew Brees showed the world that you could pretty much slice the Giants up at 3rd and long on every single 3rd and long. Following that crap-fest against the Saints, the Giants gave up three or more touchdowns in nine of their last eleven games. It was ugly and the only saving grace down a truly ugly second half was taking down a flying-high Dallas team and sweeping the season series. If there was anything good about last season, it was the Giants going in to Dallas’ Temple To Excess and taking a big steaming dump on the carpet in the stadium’s inaugural game. But, hey, the Cowboys got a playoff win out of it bringing their total playoff wins in the last decade to, well, one.

The Giants have been snakebitten by injuries in the last few seasons. They continue to pay off the deal they made with Satan to defeat the Patriots in Super Bowl 42. This season has started off quite the same. The Giants have already lost Domenik Hixon to a season-ending injury when the new practice facility’s field turn hyper-extended his knee and tore his ACL. Chase Blackburn, second on the depth chart at all linebacker positions, was carted off the field during the first pre-season game. Eli Manning suffered a freak head gash when Brandon Jacobs bumped him in to a crushing head gash that may or may not lead to a mild concussion.

This Season

The Giants rebuilt their secondary essentially from scratch and spent half their draft picks on defensive line players. Osi Umenyora should be fully recovered from his ACL tear (a two-year injury, really) and Justin Tuck should be healed from Flozell “Cheatin Douchebag” Adams’ dirty play (which, for the record, I’m a proponent of not starting a single first-string player against the Steelers so Cheatin Douchebag can get dirty shots in). The defense got the bulk of the attention last year since they were almost entirely responsible for the team’s ineptness down the stretch. Lost in the pile of awful that was last season was Eli Manning turning in his finest statistical season to date as he was able to make use of the Giants’ complement of decent receivers. This season, the Giants grabbed undrafted free agents like Victor Cruz who have gotten a chance to shine with minor injuries to Steve Smith and Hakeem Nicks. Victor Cruz put on a one-man show in the first preseason game (6 receptions for 145 yards an 3 TDs) vs. the Jets and with the help of Gartrelle Johnson (a running back getting a look) the Giants appear to have a few players to plug in as injury replacements. I imagine that Tom Coughlin’s patience with Brandon Jacobs will be short this season and, should Jacobs continue to disappoint, a guy like Johnson might be on the cusp of getting a real look.

Another sub-plot of this season, and I find this stunning, is going to be Tom Coughlan job-watch. It is absolutely stunning to me that a guy who pulled off one of the most unlikely Super Bowl victories in recent memory and the Giants are still not discussing extending Coughlin through 2011. Let’s keep in mind here, Coughlin has been the Giants’ coach for six seasons. In that time, he’s won the NFC East twice, gotten four playoff berths, and one Super Bowl. It’s utterly baffling to me that Coughlin has to sing for his supper again this season less than 5 years removed from a Super Bowl win but such is life — along with unconscionable PSLs and insane season ticket prices — in post-Wellington Mara Giant-land.

Schedule Breakdown
First Quarter — vs. Carolina, at Indianapolis (Sunday Night), vs. Tennessee, vs. Chicago (Sunday Night): The Giants’ schedule is bizarrely bottom-heavy this year. Save for this Week 2 game vs. Indianapolis and the Week 7 game at Dallas, the crushing part of the Giants’ schedule comes almost entirely in the second half. Carolina and Chicago should be wins. Chicago is still Chicago — a team with an aging defense, no receivers, and Jay Cutler. I’m reserving judgment on Indianapolis until I see how they perform in this new era, but let’s say I’m not pencilling in a win.

Second Quarter — at Houston, vs. Detroit, at Dallas (Monday Night), Bye, at Seattle: The Giants have to do some damage through this part of the schedule. Houston, Detroit, and Seattle should all be wins with the regular toss-up in Dallas. I will say, of all the teams in the East this season, Dallas scares me the least. We know what they are… and they’re them without Marion Barber. My bold prediction this season is Dallas doesn’t make the playoffs, finishing behind both the Giants and the Redskins and getting trounced on their trip through the AFC South.

Third Quarter — vs. Dallas, at Philly (Sunday Night), vs. Jacksonville, vs. Washington: Brutal second half with five of their six divisional bloodbaths coming in the last eight weeks and the likely top half of the NFC North filling out two of the other three. 2-2 would be an acceptable outcome through this stretch though if they’re a playoff team it should be 3-1. They should take one from a Philly team who still doesn’t know quite what it did when it got rid of Donovan McNabb and continue their ownership of the Redskins at the Meadowlands. I’m going to presume that Jacksonville is a should win. Asking them to sweep Dallas two years in a row is a bold claim.

Fourth Quarter — at Minnesota, vs Philly, at Green Bay, at Washington: Tough stretch to close the season, too. It’s very likely Favre will be back this season so I expect the Vikings to be in the hunt for the division or a Wildcard. Green Bay is likely still the second best team in the NFC North so they’ll be fighting with the Vikings for a spot. Besides that, Philly won’t be a lay-up and Washington will be right in the hunt. You know what makes me really sad? Facing McNabb the last week of the season with a playoff berth on the line. McNabb murders the Giants and I expect a change in laundry won’t change that.

Should Win: Philly(x2), Chicago, Detroit, Jacksonville, Houston, Carolina, Seattle (7-1)
Toss-Up: Dallas (x2), Washington (x2), Minny, Green Bay, Tennessee (4-3)
Should Lose: Indy (0-1)

Projected Record: 11-5, Over 8.5. 2-seed.

Go Blue.

Part One
Part Two

Day Four — 7/7, London
- This would be our earliest morning. We decided to do one all-day bus trip so we could see Stonehenge and cram a couple of other things in to the trip. So, we decided to take the “extremely popular” Windsor Castle, Stonehenge, and Bath tour. This was also the first day we had a stereotypical London morning — gray, overcast, and slightly drizzly. We walked from our hotel to the nearest pick-up location. We walked past a small cafe which had grilled cheddar-cheese baguettes for breakfast. Also, we walked past an old-man steakhouse. In London, old-man steakhouses apparently have lit torches out front. Of course they do.

- The bus picked us up and made a few stops at some various other hotels on the way to the central tour location. This was the first time I really got a good look at what rush hour traffic in London is like. I walk to the subway across the West Side Highway where the Battery Tunnel comes in to Manhattan. I cross Lexington Ave to get to my office building. Neither of these compare to the traffic disaster that is London. Take a city whose infrastructure was built before carriages were even invented and put cars on them. I can’t imagine driving there every day… or even once a week… or really ever. Manhattan driving seems like a video game. London driving seems like frustration of stopping and avoiding fender benders and double-decker bus death.

- Windsor Castle: One of the Queen’s three official residences with Buckingham Palace and the Edinburgh Palace. Our tour guide was surprised the queen was there because she had been speaking at the United Nations the day before. We were informed that when the Queen’s standard is flying from the castle’s flagpole, that means the queen is there. Otherwise, the residence flies the flag of the UK. In what would become a running theme at old British places, no photography was allowed inside. We blew through the (probably more interesting) small town that surrounds the palace and were herded through a room containing the Queen’s dollhouse and doll collection and photographs of the royal family. Then we went through the royal apartments. The apartments were interesting — with bedrooms and meeting rooms and such. The coolest part was probably the weapon collection (swords and guns though the years). Really, I like walking around old buildings, but I’m not a huge fan of being herded through velvet rope, one-way mazes designed to just move a bunch of people through. As for the dollhouse — we got a huge story about how this dollhouse had electricity and working sinks and electric outlets (in the 30s) and also that the former Princess’ dolls were outfitted in top-end designer dresses. I found myself thinking more about “royal opulence and waste” than “isn’t this cool”. Thanks, politics and age.

- Stonehenge: By far the most interesting part of the trip and, in retrospect, it sucks we didn’t just do a trip that let us stay here for half the day. The structure itself is surrounded by a footpath and a velvet rope preventing people from getting closer than our pictures suggest. It was also kind of crowded, so getting pictures of the rocks without people on the other side was nearly impossible. The tour guide provided a ton of cool information as we approached on the bus, talking about the period in history in which it was built and pointing out prehistoric burial mounds in the surrounding countryside. Stonehenge would be a place I’d love to somehow be able to visit without a huge crowd of people and just sit in the center and meditate and see what I feel but, sadly, I doubt that will ever happen. I’m glad I got to see it, though.

- Bath: This rather old town is on the tour due to the Roman Baths that were started in 60(!)AD and built for the next couple hundred years. According to the tour guide, these baths were rediscovered in the late 1800s and the town regrew around them. I could have taken or left this portion of the tour also. It was a combination of things: A college graduation going on that day so the town was super packed, a brother and sister pair on the bus sitting behind me who yelled at each other for, literally, the entire two hour ride from Stonehenge, the tour guide being very excited to tell me Bath was cool because celebrities live there, and having almost no time to explore the town because of extra time taken at Windsor Castle that morning. I will say, the Roman Bathhouse itself was really interesting if for no other reason than I was able to get a real life picture of the LOST Glowy Light Cave.

- If I had it to do over again, I’d do the half-day trip to Stonehenge. There wasn’t much to see at Windsor Castle that you couldn’t see in most other old castles and, honestly, a day to walk around the village might have been a little more interesting. As for Bath, it seemed like a fabulously old, slightly uninteresting tourist trap. Potentially, I could see myself wanting to stay at Bath for a few days and maybe get a better sense of the town, but as a two-hour visit while in a murderous rage due to being crammed on a bus with oblivious rudeness, I didn’t enjoy it. At this point, I know it’s Internet cliche to complain about poorly-behaved kids, but five hours of louder-than-my-full-volume-iPod bickering without even a token “shut the f**k up” from (blissfully sleeping) mom, dad, or grandpa was too much. By the time we got back to London, I hated them more than my previous least favorite travel pair — the couple who made out for 4-hours on the NYC-Boston bus — and, of course, they were American. I’m going to pretend they were from Philly.

- After the interminable bus trip, it was time to drink. We had gotten off the bus at the first stop that looked remotely familiar to get away from the Phillies’ Fans. After wandering aimlessly for a few minutes and making use of Google Maps for Blackberry, we went to the Hoop and Toy to watch Spain vs. Germany. People in England like rooting against Germany? Jeez, guys… grudge much? Very similar experience to the previous pub, except this time the Spanish bartender rightly poked fun at the Yanks’ second consecutive World Cup elimination by Ghana. I was sad.

Day Five — 7/8, London
- The last day in London was a rather laid back day. After having a breakfast of glorious crepes we went to meet one of PLR’s high school friends who remains the only person I personally know with a CD. She performed in a band called The Carnies in New York, and eventually moved to London. Currently, she teaches music and has relaunched herself under the stage name Vivien Glass. Coincidentally, she lives near the Abbey Road studio. I didn’t have Abbey Road on the tourist list, but we got to scratch it off anyway. We had lunch at a cafe where she was a regular and, in fact, performing at later in the week. Our waitress was very Spanish and very excited about the events of the previous evening and, since I didn’t see her again, a belated “cheers!” for Spain’s World Cup win.

- Following lunch, we went back to the hotel for a couple hours before heading back out to have dinner with one of PLR’s former bosses who took a 3-year rotation in London. We had a rather nice Italian dinner where PLR and he talked a lot of shop and I ate a lot of bread. Though we did get to walk around a rather, um, glitzy section of London. By glitzy I mean that there were Porsches and Lamborghinis parked on the street. This was not the first time I found myself wondering about people who had six-figures to drop on a car, but not enough leftover to pop for a garage. Seems dumb. I kind of got the sense from the office buildings, small parks, and pubs that this was a business district. It was good Italian dinner and I learned a lot about financial services.

- We ended the night at a small bar across from our hotel named PJ’s. In my most poorly thought out plan of the week, I decided to top the night off with a glass of Port. Pro-tip: one should only do that at a restaurant or a winery. In a bar it’s just dumb.

Sadly, I didn’t handle scheduling very well at the end of June. I was planning on writing this at the beginning of July, not realizing that I’d be furiously packing and panicking on July 1st. Then, with two weeks in Europe entirely removed from baseball — to the point I actually forgot the All-Star Game occurred — I just decided the June edition wasn’t happening. I’m not sure what it says about me as a fan or baseball as a sport that, over two weeks when baseball was totally removed from my consciousness, I really didn’t think about it or miss it at all. I returned to find a Mets team that was 4 games out when I left were another 2.5 back and inexplicably sinking even though their best player had returned and their starting rotation had shifted such that the 3-5 starters were doing better than the 1-2.

1) While I still think Jerry Manuel deserves one full year to manage an uninjured team, I have finally reached the point where I wouldn’t be sad to see him gone. I’ve seen enough sacrifice bunts while down 3 runs and the team running themselves in to outs to last me a lifetime. Also things I’ve seen enough of: relievers forced to warm-up two or three times per game, Pedro Feliciano and Fernando Nieve being used like Manuel is trying to murder them, playing for one run in road games, running out of players in nine-inning games, inexplicable choices like not pinch-running for Rod Barajas in the ninth inning down 1-run even though they’re carrying three catchers, insisting on using guys even when they’re clearly toast, and not letting the best players play. Look, I like Jeff Francouer as much as the next guy but, pre-Jason Bay’s injury, he should never get a start over Angel Pagan. Ever. Manuel manages by his gut, which is great when it works, but more often than not it doesn’t. What I’m seeing is a guy the players kind of like, but also a guy who can’t quite seem to get the guys motivated to go out there every day. They’re sluggish, they frequently make bad decisions, and their defense is not exactly inspired. Manuel has the right temperament to be a major league manager: He’s level-headed, he doesn’t overreact to bed stretches or get too high on good stretches; but he doesn’t seem to impart that temperament to the players. Manuel has trouble getting them up for big games or down from bad stretches. That’s not good.

2) The most frustrating part of the Mets for me this season has been their inability to play well on both sides of the ball at the same time. Earlier this season, the pitchers and the bullpen couldn’t protect three or four run leads. The week I got back from vacation, the Mets were on a 11-game west coast road trip. During that road trip, the team lost 7 games by 2 runs or less. In this same stretch, the pitchers gave up 3-runs or less in 8 of the 11 games. I could forgive that if it only happened in San Francisco vs. Lincecum, Cain, and a resurgent Zito… but it’s much harder to forgive it in Arizona against a terrible team. The D-Backs scored 13 runs on Mets’ pitchers in the desert and then turned around and scored another 14 in Citi Field this past weekend. That, my friends, is a disaster. This is exactly the opposite of their early season problems, which saw them losing way too many games 10-8 or 7-5. Most teams deal with one or the other… it’s a rare pile of sh*t to deal with both.

3) There are going to be a good number of folks who will crush the general manager for standing pat at the deadline. I made this point last season — what move, exactly, would have fixed this team? By and large, pitching has not been the problem, so sending a pile of future for Lee or Oswalt would have been nice but, really, not a game-breaker. The Mets’ 3.94/3.71 starter/reliever ERA split is not the problem. Also, which offensive position were they going to add the ubiquitous “bat” everyone was calling for? Carlos Beltran, Jason Bay, and Angel Pagan are a good outfield. David Wright, Jose Reyes, and Ike Davis’ positions weren’t up for grabs. That leaves, potentially, catcher (the team has been carrying three) and second base. So, essentially, the move of destiny was to trade for a power bat at 2b. Which means Dan Uggla. It would be unlikely for the Marlins to trade Dan Uggla in the division when they’re arguably still in the race and the Mets’ line-up really doesn’t need an additional righty bat to strike out behind Jason Bay. For whatever reason, the team doesn’t sync. Either the pitching is on or the hitting is on, but they’re rarely both on at the same time. That’s not fixed via trade.

4) Also, let’s keep in mind… it’s an oft-repeated platitude when a team gets a guy back from injury to say “it’s like making a big trade.” In this case, though, it’s really true. The Mets essentially traded Jeff Francoeur for Carlos Beltran. A team really can’t do much better in a trade. Beltran isn’t producing yet… he will. Unfortunately, he’s still working on a razor-thin fan tolerance line because he struck out that one time in 2006.

5) To the people who still insist Omar needs to go, I’ll throw it to my friend Mike:
Omar Minaya’s resume vs. the Mets’ timeline…

Notice a trend. When he’s here, we contend. When he’s gone, we’re a laughingstock. This can not be a coincidence. Is he perfect? No. Has he made mistakes? Yes. I’ll wait patiently while you show me a GM who hasn’t ever been burned on a contract. Still waiting. I’m sorry….you cant find one? Of course you can’t. The difference is how the team handles bad contracts, where we won’t eat an obviously bad contract and replace someone like Ollie. What’s a GM going to do then? He’s gotta find creative and cheap alternatives. Omar does this as well as anyone (like Dickey, Takahashi, etc). If you want to fire Omar, you better bring in someone fantastic and not just fire him for the sake of change. He’s a good GM who’s stuck with a tough ownership position and has consistently put a contender on the field. This isn’t much different than Theo Epstein or Brian Cashman, except those guys, when they miss on a contract, can just eat it.

6) As someone who tries to be level-headed when it comes to the team’s players, it really is time for Oliver Perez to go. Steve Phillips (whose opinion I don’t usually put much stock in) told WFAN that the biggest drawback to the Wilpons is that they refuse to eat contracts, lest the player experience a renaissance on another team. This is dumb. Look, at this point Oliver Perez is done on the Mets. The team doesn’t want to see him, the fans don’t want to see him, and the manager really doesn’t want to use him. This means that unless the team is in a blowout, they’re playing down a roster spot. That’s not good. Ollie is worse than replacement level at this point… it’s time for him to go and, if he turns around and pitches up a storm for someone else, the fans will understand. Stretch Meija out for a couple more starts at AA, send Takahashi back to the pen, and let Ollie take his talents to South Beach. Meija can be a fifth starter with Taka caddying him every fifth day.

7) Usually “pressing” is a platitude offered by a manager to the media so he can protect a player from those who would over-analyze a slump. Over-analyzing is all we do here and no player or manager is willing to say “yeah, I’m in a slump. It happens sometimes. There’s not much I can do but give me a day off and I’ll come out of it eventually” because that totally true statement would be run through the insane media and become “he doesn’t care enough.” The closest we’ve ever gotten to this in a news broadcast is the Dustin Pedroia Laser Show interview. There is a difference between pressing and slumping. In the Mets’ case, they’re all pressing. I get the sense that they know they’re playing well under their ceiling and they’ve collectively decided to put it all on themselves to win. Hitting doesn’t work that way.

8) Speaking of slumping, let’s all collectively deciding to settle down about Jason Bay. Look, our ownership built a gigantic baseball stadium and we watched an entire team struggle to learn how to hit in the park last season. For right-handed hitters, the process is as follows. Phase One: see shots that should be home runs turn in to outs or doubles via the Great Wall Of Flushing. Phase Two: start tinkering with your approach to get your power stroke closer to either foul pole. Phase Three: go insane because tinkering with your approach is the worst thing you can do. Phase Four: notice that, while your home runs are down, your other power numbers are up; Bay, for example, already has a career high in triples and is on pace to challenge his season high in doubles. Phase Five: relax and get back to normal. Jason Bay is mired in Phase Three. Hopefully this current trip to the DL will move him through Phase Four and in to Phase Five. Bay has been admitted terrible but if he comes off the DL and tears up August and September, we’ll forget the rest of this ever happened.

9) If I’m worried about the long-term mental stability of any player, it’s Mike Pelfrey. After a killer first half, Pelfrey handed in a 0-3, 10.02 ERA July that featured five starts with a 4 innings/start average. That’s not good, and Pelfrey’s not been the most stable of pitchers, famously visiting a sports psychologist over this past summer so he could settle down on the mound. It worked for a while. It’s stopped. Pelfrey’s starts have been brutal to watch, as he’s regressed in to his twitchy, unable to throw strike former self. Also brutal to watch: Johan Santana’s 7 ER starts this season. Considering Johan and Halladay have had a rough go of it in a start or two this season, this clearly means the NL is better than the AL.

10) When defending my relatively level-headed approach to this season amidst a crapstorm of negativity, I’ve pointed to this week as DEFCON 1 Week. If the Mets went through this week’s road trip through Atlanta and Philly at 4-2 or better, I’d consider the season alive. If they go 2-4 or worse and were 8 games back, it would be time to start focusing on Giants’ season. So far, they looked lackluster and dead in game one and fought back to win game two. If they’re still in it after this week — they still have 7 games left against the Braves in September and, really, if the Braves think Billy Wagner’s going to be saving them big games down the stretch… well… I know how that movie ends.

Day One — 7/4/2010; London:
- For the first time in my history of air travel, my flight arrived an hour ahead of schedule. Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem but PLR and I coordinated our flights such that I’d arrive from the US at 11:30 AM and her flight from India would arrive at 12:30 PM. My 10:15 arriving flight with the aforementioned priority bags meant by the time I transferred from terminal one to terminal five, I still had something like two hours before her flight even arrived — much less by the time she clears customs from, you know, India. Also, I’m pretty sure I was still drunk after my shortened nap. You know the scene in Dogma where Ben Affleck tells Matt Damon the reason he likes to hang out in airports is because he likes watching people experience that one perfect moment when nothing else matters except seeing the person they haven’t seen. I get it now. That’s my sappiness for the year.

- Travel Tip: Cabs from Heathrow to Kensington cost about £60. For those keeping score at home, that’s a $90 cab ride to kick off the trip. The positive here is we found out the subway actually stops right at Heathrow. Unfortunately, as PLR had a 70-pound suitcase (not an exaggeration) there was no earthly way we (and by “we” I mean “I”) were going to lug six bags on a strange subway system with an indeterminate number of stairs.

- Arrive at the Sydney House Chelsea after a good 45 minutes in the cab. Really, the only con for this place was the incredibly small room we were in for the first five days and the coffin-sized elevator that posed a problem with a 70-lb suitcase. The room was literally only large enough for a king-sized bed and about three feet of walkway on each side. Everything else was great. The breakfast was good and the service was unbelievably awesome. As we were coming back here for one more overnight following the Scotland trip, the hotel stored our bags for a week and had them back in our room when we returned. If we’d gotten the room for the entire week that we had on that final overnight, I wouldn’t have had any complaints. The second room was still a king-sized bed, but also had room for a couch and a small desk. I believe the bigger room was the “deluxe” double — which for the extra £15 is very worth it. The neighborhood was awesome and being only one block from a well-serviced Tube station was great.

- I am very unclear on what, exactly, went on between the time we got in the cab and we had lunch about four hours later. Between the jet-lag, being really hungry, and my body trying to fight off the effects of bourbon — I’m pretty sure those hours are just gone. I realize the joke that goes here, but I’m taking the high road.

- Our first touristy trip was to check out Hyde Park which, I think, is only slightly smaller than Central Park. We walked around a bit until we found a bench to sit down on and catch up on PLR’s seven weeks in India. This was the first time I understood how California people must feel when they visit New York in May and people are in shorts and T-shirts when it’s 68 and breezy. Having just left a New York City that’s been 90+ and humid for the entire summer, the pleasant London temperatures were, well, slightly chilly. Everyone was dressed in sundresses and shorts. While we were sitting, I watched a group of five teenagers play cricket. This would be the beginning of my four-day quest to understand the game. Spoiler Alert: I failed.

- Following the walk through the park, we went to our first neighborhood pub — the Zetland Arms. My first pub experience was a little awkward. People in London don’t stand at the bar — it’s fabulously used just to wait for and order drinks. Food orders are taken by the bartender and then its brought to your table. Music is kept at a volume such that you can have a pleasant conversation. Taking your glass outside is perfect acceptable and, in summer, apparently encouraged. Tipping is 10% or less. Which means my £1 tip was absurdly inflated. I wouldn’t find this out until Saturday, though. I also started to try to muddle through the ridiculous amount of change. A .02 pence piece, England? Really? Also — fish and chips is all I expected.

Day 2: 7/5/2010; London:
- This was to be the first of our super-touristy days. We wanted to break the trip up in to “hanging in the neighborhood” and “hitting some obvious tourist spots.” On the docket today was Buckingham Palace and Westminster Abbey. After breakfast at the hotel — eggs benedict for me in which I discovered hollandaise in London is more dijon based — we decided to walk to Westminster Abbey making the mistaken assumption that “it’s only two subway stops” meant the same in London as it does in Manhattan.

- Two miles later and we got to Buckingham Palace at just about 11:00 AM. The changing of the guard occurs at about 11:20, so we didn’t get anything other than a few looks at the palace and a super-large crowd. Honestly, we didn’t have much of an interest in seeing the changing of the guard, so we instead walked over to the guard-house to watch them warm up for the parade — which involved them playing marching band instruments in full regalia. Impressive.

- Then I saw this pub sign. I didn’t get to go in the pub, but the sign was too cool to not take a picture.

- Next was a somewhat quicker walk to Westminster Abbey. We were excited to find out that on Tuesdays there were free concerts offered. So we hung around to check it out. For future reference, PLR is always the only person who ever knows not to clap in between movements. That’s right, y’all; classical music reference.

- Westminster Abbey is a weird place to walk around. It’s £15 (I think) to walk around what is basically a burial chamber. There are graves in the oldest part of the Abbey from the 1000s and the 1100s. I’ll let that sink in. People were laid there 900+ years ago. They’ve been laying in burial chambers for literally ten times the number of years they were alive. The realization that you’re dead for a really, really long time is sobering. There also appears to be residences in the abbey, which I find amazing. Is there anyplace in the world more haunted than a 1000 year old mausoleum?

- My favorite picture of the entire trip is the protester camp that is apparently always set up across from the Abbey in Parliament Square. It’s basically a tent city with banners deriding the government for conspiracies and 9/11. My favorite banner was this one. Pro-Tip: When trying to convince the masses that your form of government is the better one, it’s best if the apparent alternative is not living in tent cities.

- Look kids! Big Ben! Parliament!

- As we were in a super-touristy part of town all day, this was the first time I was able to notice that the Official Tourist Uniform is internationally the same. Cargo shorts, polo shirt, sneakers, fanny pack, and backpack gets it done in any city in the world. Later, when we were in Edinburgh, we’d find out that even European tourists wear the uniform.

- After a ton of walking we finally went back to the hotel to get settled for dinner. PLR decided that six weeks without pizza was quite enough, so we went to a fancy pizza restaurant we’d walked past earlier that day. I got a spicy beef pizza. I also ate it properly for the region, cutting the full pie with a fork and knife while shaking my head sadly at PLR’s American crassness. It was also the first recorded appearance of the trip’s tagline: “Know how I know you’re not from here?” See, PLR made a week out of telling me how much I looked like a tourist when we were in Germany. So, things like eating a pizza with her hands in London got her called out.

Day 3: 7/6/2010; London
- This was the day we noticed our neighborhood didn’t have many tourists. We went around the corner to have breakfast at a diner we’d spotted the day before. We sat down for breakfast and it slowly dawned on us we were the only people who hadn’t stopped in there for a quick breakfast on their break and one of the few who didn’t get a “see you tomorrow” on the way out. It was also the day I discovered that breakfast in London comes with baked beans instead of home fries. Tasty but unexpected.

- The plan today was to check out The British Museum because PLR’s been reading books about Egypt and they had quite a collection of Egyptian artifacts. I just like museums and this one happened to have the Rosetta Stone.

- After having lunch at a pancake place we saw before the museum (and the “pancakes” turned out to be “giant, 2-foot diameter crepes with ice cream and fruit on top”) I wanted to check out the The Grand Freemason Lodge of London. It was a pretty incredible tour with a bunch of history and, honestly, the Grand Lodge Room in the building is one of the nicest things I’ve ever laid eyes on. The tour guide told us the Lodge was built after World War 1 as a symbol of “peace” and included things unheard of for the time — like an early form of central air, electricity, and an in-wall vacuum system.

- Following a quick nap and shower, it was time to head out for the Netherlands vs. Uruguay World Cup Semifinal at the Chelsea Potter. I love the pub signs. I bought one for my dad’s basement and I’m pretty sure if I ever have a man room that I’d want a collection of them. This was the second neighborhood location we were in on Day 3 where we were, near as we could tell, the only Americans. This is generally our goal — hence the, um, disdain for Atlantis. Regardless, sports remains the universal language as the bartender asked me both where I was from in The States and made a joke about The Yanks’ (that’s the international nickname of our national team, not the Yankees) ineptness. I joked back that if we were inept, what was England that we drew them? This led to a conversation as to whether Landon Donovan would end up on loan to the Premiership this season, if the 8-1 odds on Arsenal to win the Premiership were as good as they sounded, and a “Welcome To London, Yank” round. God bless sports.

Chelsea Potter and Zetland Arms images via Last Rounds on Flickr.

Due to my current situation of being on antibiotics following vacation, I can sadly not consume alcohol for the next five weeks. I have one first draft left in the hopper (the last Sam Barrel Room) which will go up next week.

Everyone who knows how easy it is to lose weight has told me if I quit drinking I’ll lose like 20 lbs immediately. I can’t wait!

As most of you know, I shamelessly lifted the idea of a travel diary off Bootleg whose travails at airports always made me feel better in that “at least I’m not the only person this stuff happens to” kind of way. Some long-time friends and readers know I hate flying. I start having small-scale panic attacks 48-hours before the flight, I can think about nothing else, I meticulously call most of my family to unofficially “say goodbye”, I wear my old St. Christopher medal, and am very careful that my iPod contains the entire Pure Moods library. All of this irrational panic is then then exacerbated by the fact flying is one of life’s most miserable experiences (#FirstWorldProblems). First wait in line to check in with people who don’t have stuff ready. Then wait in line with people who are somehow still caught off guard by having to remove their shoes (we get it, it’s stupid, just f*cking do it) and their laptops out of their bags. Then, if fortunate enough to not be randomly selected for some kind of invasive pat-down, wait in a pen with 4500 other miserable people (every person under 12 counts as ten miserable people) to then wait in line to cram in to a seat specifically designed to pen as many people in to the smallest space possible. On an international flight, this is NINE people per row. Two on each side and FIVE across the center because, heaven forbid the center seat in the five-row come out so the person in that seat doesn’t have to create a major ordeal to use the bathroom. Between my irrational and inexplicable fear and the completely miserable experience of it, I often used the first part of these diaries to vent my frustration at the whole process.

Until this time. Y’see, due to circumstances, I ended up buying round-trip business class. I have never flown anything other than coach. The round trip business class ticket from JFK to Heathrow was just about exactly double the coach ticket. I really had no idea what to expect on the trip since my knowledge of American Airlines’ business class was walking through the section on my way to Coachland.

Using the new diary rules I invented just now, entries that are bolded were originally posted to the Twitter feed via my Blackberry.

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8:00 pm: Take inventory of my stuff for roughly the 270th time. I have never flown alone before and am totally convinced I’m going to forget something. I comfort my cat for roughly the 500th time, because I feel horrifically guilty about leaving an animal who won’t even know I’m gone.

8:15 pm: PLR is always insistent about getting to the airport 3 hours early. I am always insistent that this is insanity for an 11:30 PM flight. I bask in the freedom of not having to get a cab at 7:45 for an 11:30 flight.

8:40 pm: In a stroke of “this might not be so bad” I find a cab in under two minutes at prime going out time. I’m pumped.

9:02 pm: Arrive JFK. That’s right… 22 minutes to JFK… on a summer Saturday. I’m floored.

9:03 pm: Enter JFK at the American Airlines terminal. I see a line of about 25 at the check-in counter with one person at the desk. This line is not for me. My line is around the corner in a walled off area. And by “line” I mean “well-staffed room with four employees at the counter and nobody waiting.” Four people at the counter. It’s 9 pm. Total time spent checking in: two minutes.

9:06 pm: Wander aimlessly around JFK trying to find the security line I can never find. Finally find it. There is a line waiting to have their boarding passes checked before getting to security. This line is not for me. With a look at my boarding pass, the TSA agent waves me in to the “employees” line, where I go to a 2nd agent who gives my papers a cursory look before sending me to the scanners. Total time spent in pre-screen line: nil. In fairness, I’ve heard this is a JFK only feature.

9:07 pm: I choose my security line based on my normal method of “shortest line + people with their shoes already off”. I get my stuff on the belt and the screener simply walks away. No explanation, no “back in a second”… just walks away. After 30 seconds, I hop to the line on the other side. Other people stay in line. As I pass through security, the people on the other side continue to wait. He’s still not back. Ladies and gentlemen: the future of healthcare in America.

9:15 pm: As part of the business class ticket, I gain access to the business class lounge. The business class lounge is upstairs at JFK, well away from the gate pens most people stay in. I hand my ticket to a lady who may or may not be an extra for the Jersey Shore. After checking my ticket to confirm I belong in the special club, she presents me with two complimentary drink tickets.

9:20 pm: My first complimentary drink is a Makers Mark Manhattan. Being as I’ve been in a state of constant panic for 48 hours, it gets destroyed.

9:26 pm: Manhattan number two.

9:53 pm: French dude: Parle Francais? Me: Petit peu, pourquoi? FD: C’est votre jour chanceux. Make that 5 drink vouchers. Widro and I have this theory that once you get in to the rich dude’s club, it’s a special place where you all kinda look out for each other and just work at keeping your money and screwing the poor and middle class people. This would be an example of that. There was no reason for Mr Frenchman to give me his three leftover drink vouchers, but he just did because, well, I fooled him by being inside the velvet rope.

10:00 pm: I make the executive decision to switch over to Sam Summers because, well, five Manhattans would have been the end of me.

11:07 pm: In the midst of my final Sam Summer, I was screwing with my phone when they made the announcement my flight was boarding. I packed up my stuff, walked out of the lounge, and headed to my gate. There were about 30 people waiting in line. That line was not for me. There was no one in my line. Time spent in boarding line: nil.

11:18 pm: 10 minutes after sitting down, just handed a free champagne. I bet in coach there’s a screaming child. Hahahahahahahahahahah. In reality, I took two plastic flutes of champagne, crushed them, took a free newspaper, this sack of goodies, and ordered a steak for dinner with a glass of merlot. Before dinner arrived, I was given a complimentary set of Bose soundproof headphones to quiet the total lack of noise. Sadly, I had to give those back but they do, in fact, live up to their marketing. Putting them on, I couldn’t hear anything other than what I was listening to. Not even the noise of the airplane. Also, my seat turns in to a bed. There’s that much room. Also: so in business class, you sit in a lounge boozin, they announce you’re boarding, then you walk right on the plane. Then, you get to watch the poor people get on. hahahaha Suffer, poor people! #TooMuchBooze I became drunk on both power and booze simultaneously.

The rest of the flight is somewhat hazy. I do recall ordering a Dewars on the rocks which turned out to be a double (also free). I recall putting on a BreatheRight and informing the flight attendant to wake me up if I was snoring too loudly. I vaguely recall that our flight had the Under 23 World Cup Women’s team which led to a rousing “USA!” chant which I hope included more people than myself. I recall watching the first five minutes of Shutter Island before passing out hard until “express breakfast”. Also, as I was sitting in the fourth row, which was the first row of business, I got off the plane first. Time spent waiting to get off plane: nil.

10:30 am (GMT): Flight arrives an hour early. For the first time in history, I’m annoyed by a flight getting in early because I was actually comfortably sleeping and my plan of getting 6 hours of sleep is reduced to 5. I go to passport services and am certainly still drunk. I have a conversation with the British passport lady that didn’t go well because I could neither remember how long I was going to be there or the name of my hotel at first. I probably also smell like a mix of bourbon, wine, and meat. I get a harsh speech. I don’t remember any of it but I fully deserved it.

10:45 am: Walk to the luggage carousel to wait. The carousel, however, is not for me. My bags, with their orange priority tag, are already waiting for me next to the carousel. Time waiting for bags: nil.

So, to recap — for the approximate cost of “double”, the customer basically gets to skip all lines, be boozed up and happy, and not wait for anything. I’m pretty sure there’s something to be said here about legacy airlines and the American public’s demand that flights be cheap. PLR warned me that the first business class flight would ruin me forever and, I have to say, she’s right. I can’t imagine flying a legacy airline in coach again… especially when it’s such a miserable experience. And this is before even getting in to Heathrow’s business class lounge. Heathrow’s lounge featured all of the above but with free everything. A spread of sandwiches, snacks, chips, soda, and desserts on top of a selection of top shelf alcohol, wine, and refrigerator of beer in a do-it-yourself bar. The flight back to the US on Saturday was extremely crowded. When we eventually got to the gate from the lounge, there was a line of over 200 people waiting to check in. In London, there’s another quick screening process — which randomly involves full pat-downs, interviews, and bag searches — before getting in to the gate. We walked to the front of that line, too.

Somehow, I have a bad feeling that Oktoberfest 2 just got about $1000 more expensive.